I’m writing this article to show my readers that leadership isn’t just my day job, it’s also my lifestyle outside of the office. In fact, the leadership I do outside of the office makes me a better leader in the office.

For eight years in a row, I’ve taken my boys camping in the wilderness for a weekend. While it’s always good to have father-son time, our trips have a few specific purposes:

1. We get out of our comfort zone. We typically head to one of Minnesota’s many state parks. It’s great to get out of the city and into nature and experience it.
2. We do hard things. We take the long hike. We climb the steep rocks. We canoe in the wind. It’s important for us to stretch our abilities and find new limits.
3. We take calculated risks. I can definitely make that short jump. I can definitely not make that long jump. What about that medium jump? Maybe. What happens if I’m wrong? Well, I might get wet and scrape my knee. Is that worth it? Should I try?
4. We have fun and stay safe. These probably go without saying, but we do aim to have a great time. We also keep safety top-of-mind. We do things that often require Band-Aids, but not hospitals.
5. We conquer fear. Every weekend there is a moment where one of my boys gets in over their head. One of my sons was stuck on the side of a boulder and started crying. He was paralyzed with fear. I was underneath him spotting. He wanted me to come up there and rescue him, but I wanted to try something else. I talked to him in a calming voice until he regained his composure. Then I talked him through step-by-step where to place his hands and feet to make it to his destination. He did it by himself and was proud of himself for doing so.

Leadership beyond hierarchy

We started this annual tradition when my boys were very little. As the older ones grew, so did their abilities and leadership skills. I felt pride when I saw them encouraging their younger brother using the same words, tone, and technique that I used on them.

Something unexpected happened last year. We all decided we were going to try and climb up to a cave we saw. Historically, I was always the most able and had the role of instructing and encouraging the boys. This particular challenge was interesting. I was disadvantaged due to my size and weight. They had a much easier time getting to the cave than I did. I decided to let them go all the way, but I would stay below and wait for them to come down. That wasn’t acceptable to my boys. Then I heard my words coming from their mouths directed at me: “Dad, you can do it. I’ll show you where to put your hands and feet.” My sons talked me through the challenge and I made it into the cave.

Leadership on these camping weekends started with a traditional hierarchy, but as I’ve demonstrated, that quickly evolved. I was not the only one giving leadership. I developed a culture of leadership. The encouragement, coaching, and instruction flowed in every direction: from parent to child, from child to child, and from child to parent.

Think about the leadership culture on your team. Is everyone dependent on you, or have you started to make leadership a character trait and behavior that everyone exercises? This takes intentional development, trust, and the heart of a servant leader. Being a leader means making leaders. It also means knowing when and how to follow.

I often talk to aspiring leaders that have yet to get promoted into management at work. While you work on that, also pay attention to the wealth of leadership opportunities outside of the office that can make you a better leader today.