“We live in a cynical world. A cynical world. And we work in a business of tough competitors.” – Jerry Maguire.

The world of the corporate enterprise can be a cynical place. Week after week, I preach leadership. I do it for all of you, but I also do it for me. By writing, I remind myself of the truth. Why do you and I need these constant reminders? Our world is cynical, and frankly, sometimes so are we. Cynicism is distrust, bitter complacency, sneering at hope, and laughing at optimism.

Why are we so cynical? It’s easier. It’s a coping mechanism. It’s a way of explaining reality that’s personally safe, because we mask our true feelings. It’s a way of eliminating hope, so we cannot be disappointed. Sure, it’s safe, but it’s also cold and lonely. Most importantly, it’s the single biggest antipattern for leadership.

The “gateway drug” to cynicism is sarcasm. We use humor to make light of heavy situations. This can be okay, but left unchecked, it can evolve into full blown cynicism. Sarcasm isn’t always bad, but if it dominates, it can create a calloused environment void of authentic expression of feeling. I won’t say the same is true for skepticism. I see pure skepticism as a good and healthy trait that most good engineers possess. It’s a critical thinking skill and shouldn’t be lumped in with cynicism and sarcasm.

How do you know when you’ve gone too far to the dark side? Ask yourself these questions: Am I pessimistic? Am I distrusting? Do I walk around with a scowl on my face? Am I preoccupied with negative thoughts? Do I think the future will be worse than the past? If you find yourself saying “yes” to these questions, then it’s time for a self-correction.

We all have “Eeyore days,” but we cannot live there. You can’t just stop being cynical. You have to replace it with something. As I discussed in detail in my article on self-awareness, the ability to manipulate your own emotions and attitudes is an attribute of high Emotional Intelligence or EQ. So, with what do you replace cynicism? Hope, gratitude, appreciation, respect, patience, optimism, vulnerability, passion, and trust.

I find that every company, every department, and every team is the Tale of Two Cities:

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way.”

It’s important to be grounded in reality. Recognize the coexistence of good and bad. They are both always present. Acknowledge the bad, and address the bad, but let your mind dwell on the good. See the progress, see the best reasonably possible version of the future, and focus your attention there. That’s what leadership is. It’s a choice to be positive, hopeful, aspirational, and inspirational.

It’s a new year. Let 2017 be the year where your leadership and my leadership rise above cynicism. Thoughts? Please share them in the comments below. Happy New Year to all of my readers!